Life is full of contradictions. So I hope you will please forgive me while I make several now.
The human tendency is to organize and categorize our behavior and beliefs into nice tidy packages with labels. I suppose it is the necessary nature of civilized society. But life is not tidy. It is messy. It is contradictory.
Life is paradoxical. It is enormously vast, yet wrought with minutia. It is simple and straightforward, yet complex and difficult to navigate. It is predictable and it is slippery. It bores and it thrills. It is profound and it is all smoke and mirrors.
Starring up at the darkened sky, I am reminded how quickly things change, how they so certainly begin one place and then move to something else entirely. When I began this entry the sky was blue and cloudless, and as I finish, night's cloak has ascended and the air has turned thick and heavy.
How mysterious life is in its extremities. And what can we be certain of in a world marked with such inconsistency and disparity? How can we see our way through the muddied water to our "true north?" We have to find our unwavering god within - the center, our compass, the anchor that lives between the contradiction. Between the simplicity and complexity. Between the predictability and the mystery. Behind the smoke and mirrors and underneath the perilous roller coaster of life.
Because underneath it all there is really only one true north. One unnamable, uncategorizable truth which all feelings, all beliefs, all behaviors know as home. It is the cool, calm, steady seat of the soul and it is immune to life's discrepancies. It is within each of us. But it is beneath the flesh and blood that feels and is affected; this makes us human.
Despite our efforts to manipulate our situations, we are still on this ride that is life. Despite our efforts to be happy and not sad, to be calm and not anxious, to be clear and not confused - despite all the ways we carve up our reactions to living, it is only feeling each one of them all the way through that lands us in the vibrant ache that overrides the contradiction and underrides the beauty of being alive.
Sunday, September 16
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
You have FOUND Zen. When you reach the point that you are enjoying the NOW, this day, this minute...and thoroughly enjoying the ride, the climb, the journey--the mystery...
well, you're exactly where you want to be.
Happy. Content. Blissful.
Healthy. Skinny. Smiling. Giggling.
No one has a CLUE what the NEXT second of life will bring. No amount of planning, worrying, stressing or even anticipating it will do a thing.
Just breathe deep and FEEL and EXPERIENCE and smile from your liver!
You've uncovered the secret...
and it's so fucking delicious!
God damnit, I fucking love you, Julie!!! Thank you for your beautiful response. You are amazing and I am so blessed to have you as my friend :) xoxo
I'm loving the reminder of contrast, thank you!
Thinking we are separate when everything is connected, trying to maintain stability when everything keeps changing, grasping for fullfillment when everything eventually loses its luster.
What a ride!
Post a Comment